Personal: Autism and Trauma
Growing up autistic, whether or not you have a diagnosis, is traumatic. People with autism often over internalize or externalize our emotions due to communication differences making it difficult to communicate our needs to neurotypicals. Research suggests that the possible reasons for this is either due to increased exposure to traumatic events and/or the differences in processing leading to increased perception of trauma. It is likely a combination of these two factors.
Autistic people have more traumatic experiences and adverse childhood experiences than the neurotypical population. The intersectionality of other marginalized identities adds infinite layers to the trauma from discrimination. Being autistic, especially as a child, opens the person up to increased manipulation and discrimination, which can lead to trauma symptoms in adulthood.
Because autistic brains process information differently than neurotypical brains, the experiences of trauma are also processed differently. As mentioned earlier, autistic people either over internalize or over externalize their emotions and struggle with emotional regulation due to overwhelming sensory information. Over internalization can look like depression, anxiety, and other mood disorders. Over externalization can look like anger outbursts, aggression, and other conduct disorders. Both of these are trauma responses and should be treated as such.
As of today, there is no specific trauma therapy developed for people with autism. I have experienced a multitude of traumatic experiences myself, especially related to relationships, so I have tried several different therapy modalities but with limited success. The overwhelming research for therapeutic methods is done in limited populations that often exclude autistic people from research to create uniformity of their data.
Processing trauma with autism can look similar to how neurotypicals process trauma. Some people with autism will benefit from talk therapies like CBT, or medication like Zoloft. However, autistics and their professionals need to look for ways to include the autism factor in the treatment plan. Using sensory regulation to process trauma is one of the best ways to heal the body’s experience, and studying a hyper-fixation can provide a brain break from processing traumatic events during session.
Personal: Receiving Accommodations as an Adult with ASD
When children are diagnosed with autism, there are supports available through their school system including special education and social work services. However, the transition to adulthood and independence can be especially difficult for people who struggle with changes and meeting society’s expectations. To make it a bit easier, here are some tips for getting accommodations as an adult, even if you are undiagnosed.
If you received accommodations (IEP or 504) while in school, you are given access to the services for disabled students at your school. Legally, schools that receive money from the government have to follow government laws and regulations, including the Americans with Disabilities Act. To access these services, you can ask your academic advisor to connect you or reach out to their office directly. They usually require documentation of your condition(s) and/or evidence of your previous accommodations.
If you are in higher education and did not have accommodations during your public education, you have a few options. You can: 1) reach out to the students with disabilities office anyway and see if they will take you without a diagnosis 2) seek a diagnosis from the school’s student health system or other outside specialist or 3) ask your instructors to honor your requested accommodations without the documentation.
The path for adults who are employed is similar to that of students. If you had accommodations as a child, you have a legal right to request those accommodations of your employer. If you did not, you can seek a diagnosis or ask your employer to honor your accommodations anyway. Here are some tips for getting your accommodations approved:
Prepare a list of the accommodations you’re asking for ahead of time. Do you need preferential seating in class? Do you need increased breaks during the work day? Do you need to work in a hybrid in-person/remote position? Do you need access to fidgets?
Practice how you are going to ask for accommodations. If you have previous accommodations or diagnosis, gather that paperwork ahead of time. If you are asking via email, you could ask someone to proofread it for you.
Research disability laws in your state. Some states might have different requirements about what accommodations are acceptable.
If you decide to talk to your employer or boss about creating an accessible environment, but you have not disclosed your (self)diagnosis you can try framing it as a general concern you have for accessibility. For example, if you want to ask for captions during Zoom meetings, you can request them anonymously through the app or say something like “Could we turn on the captions for anyone who may be hard of hearing?” that does not disclose the exact reason for you asking.
If you continue to run into barriers or need support gathering the documentation for a diagnosis, check out our group classes and individual consultation services where someone can work with you more one-on-one to get you the assistance you need.
Personal: Autism and Roommates
With the current skyrocketing housing prices in the United States, and the fact that many autistic people remain un- or under-employed, it is likely that many autistics will find themselves living with roommates to afford rent. I currently live in a rental house with two roommates and have lived with others in apartments in the past, so I wanted to share some of the lessons and tips I’ve learned through the years.
The most important piece of advice I can give is to try everything to get yourself something like personal space. Ideally this would be a bedroom, but I know that American dorm rooms usually have you living with at least one other person. In this situation, I would recommend turning your side of the room into an autism friendly space as much as possible. Try talking to your roommates about putting in lamps and other lights instead of using the overhead light, and deciding on rules regarding food/guests/bedtime/etc. Establishing these rules before moving in will create the best environment for you.
If you are living with people in an apartment or house, personalize your bedroom to be as cozy as possible for you. Use tapestries and blankets to rescue noise coming from the common areas. Put up string lights or lamps to avoid using the overhead light (obviously this one was big for me) and make the space your own by including your fixation or special interest in the decor. I would also suggest communicating your diagnosis to your roommates early or before you move in, and explain that you may not spend a bunch of time in common areas. This will help ensure that your roommates are understanding and don’t feel like you’re ignoring them.
The most important thing to consider when living with roommates is how to have effective communication with them. You’ll need to be able to tell them in some way what you are needing, whether that’s verbally, through text, or some kind of whiteboard system. No matter what, your roommates are going to be doing life with you, so they need to be able to respect your diagnoses and your space.
Personal: Growing Up Undiagnosed
My story of growing up undiagnosed for autism is one that many AFAB people face, especially in the United States where we have privatized healthcare. I made my way through the mental health care system, including being hospitalized more than once, but I was not diagnosed with autism until 2019 when I was 20 years old.
At one point my active diagnoses were: social anxiety, generalized anxiety, auditory processing disorder, depression, and ADD. If you have experience with AFAB autistics, it does not come as a surprise that autism was overlooked. It took my pressuring a psychologist for them to consider that, rather than having each of these different conditions, I might have one condition that encompasses all of my symptoms.
Healthcare in the United States does not have an effective form of interdisciplinary communication, so it is often up to patients and their families to request a review of their diagnoses. Treatment is often expensive, and being diagnosed as an adult is even more difficult than diagnosis as a child. This is why I support self-diagnosis in the neurodivergent community.
I plan on writing about my experience getting a diagnosis, but growing up undiagnosed contributed to my severe mental health issues to this day. I grew up feeling like an alien amongst my peers, because I knew I was fundamentally different from them but never knew the reason. If I had known I was autistic earlier, I could have accepted my diagnosis and it would have saved me countless sleepless nights researching to find a label that fit my specific version of “quirky”.
I don’t write this to place blame on any one person. I, and countless other AFAB autistics, were failed by the education and healthcare systems and fell through the cracks. This is part of what inspired me to create this organization, to try to make diagnoses easier to access.