Personal: Autism and Roommates
With the current skyrocketing housing prices in the United States, and the fact that many autistic people remain un- or under-employed, it is likely that many autistics will find themselves living with roommates to afford rent. I currently live in a rental house with two roommates and have lived with others in apartments in the past, so I wanted to share some of the lessons and tips I’ve learned through the years.
The most important piece of advice I can give is to try everything to get yourself something like personal space. Ideally this would be a bedroom, but I know that American dorm rooms usually have you living with at least one other person. In this situation, I would recommend turning your side of the room into an autism friendly space as much as possible. Try talking to your roommates about putting in lamps and other lights instead of using the overhead light, and deciding on rules regarding food/guests/bedtime/etc. Establishing these rules before moving in will create the best environment for you.
If you are living with people in an apartment or house, personalize your bedroom to be as cozy as possible for you. Use tapestries and blankets to rescue noise coming from the common areas. Put up string lights or lamps to avoid using the overhead light (obviously this one was big for me) and make the space your own by including your fixation or special interest in the decor. I would also suggest communicating your diagnosis to your roommates early or before you move in, and explain that you may not spend a bunch of time in common areas. This will help ensure that your roommates are understanding and don’t feel like you’re ignoring them.
The most important thing to consider when living with roommates is how to have effective communication with them. You’ll need to be able to tell them in some way what you are needing, whether that’s verbally, through text, or some kind of whiteboard system. No matter what, your roommates are going to be doing life with you, so they need to be able to respect your diagnoses and your space.
